Ever know a secret you can't tell?
Ever had plan you can't make sense of?
Ever felt joyful yet sorrowful?
Ever lived you life day by day with no future plans?
Ever count down to a deadline?
Ever, ever, ever?

14 days and counting down to the handing in of my thesis. Stressed yet procrasinating. What a great irony. Think I am to a point where my brain activity is well below normal.

All I can do now, is procrasinate. Listed are the 4 MAJOR forms of procrasination:
1) Deciding what I should do NEXT year (pHD.... supervisors....projects....)
2) Thinking about the past semester which is not over yet, and reminiscing about the most challenging and exciting semester in my entire 4 years. And it hasn't even ended!
3) Thinking about how I should play in the next few months about my thesis submission
4) Reading pHD comic strips at http://www.phdcomics.com/

To all fellow Honours mates thinking about doing a pHD out there,
cheers and press on.. for the time is near!

Gosh... I hate confrontations.

Hate to watch the clock tick and then tock. My heart racing as if I was runing in a 100m race that is never ending. * Oh wait... that equalsto a cross-country race* (stupid Jing)! I have prepared my speech for confrontation. It is like a battle!

How should I end it off? It has been great working with you and I hope it will continue for the better? or Smile and walk off? Or Lets pray??? Not as if I have nothing else to do! I have plenty to do. Gosh, now I understand why Shimei said that our God is hilarious, a very good sense of humour indeed!

Thought presidency could be fun and easy and hopefully smooth-riding! But no.... Why must I be so freaking stubborn and why the heck must I put myself in such a big mess. If I were to close one eye and heck about it, everything will go on smoothly and I will have no troubles at all. Why must I have a warped thinking? WHy do I like changes, challenges? Why the heck did I decide to even take up honours and presidency?

Gosh... Now that I have both, I need to at least do my best and give my all. At least that way , I know I have done my part and my best. Last semester as an undergraduate and this is the best parting gift! *no sacarsm intended*


Ramble, ramble.... Jing..Jing... are you there??? Sorry everyone, Jing has decided to take a break from the world, pardon her.. She has been in the lab all week and all day. If she is not in the lab she is dealing with some OCF stuff. Please pardon her for being cranky and ignoring the rest of the world! As her other Jing, I will forgive her.....:) you see she is ignoring me too so you have no right to blame her... Muahahahah!

Whats with facebook? Ailing.. why do I need a facebook when I have you to update me? Besides, I don't mind being the last to know everything since it always happen and I am so used to it. As long as I am not the last to know that I am getting married on my wedding day! Ha... Another question, ailing, the queen of stoner! How to stone? I can't seem to sit down and do nothing... even if I try to do nothing, my brain is thinking about work and other stuff? Whats the difference between stoning and rocking? Better give me a report on that since you are so free!

I can't help but rattle on about my exciting and challenging life ahead!

First and foremost, my precious house has been taken away from me! Current Status: Homeless-to-be. My plan will be to move my mattress into the lab and make the lab my home. It will be the most convenient thing ever, and it will also fulfil my desire to stay close to school. It is perfect! Fast ADSL, Phone Line, Bathrooms on every alternate level, Security Building, Close to school. Rent: Free, all bills included! That is the best package ever... I wonder why no one has ever done that yet.

Secondly, I am in the midst of looking for a supervisor to apply for my pHD. The due date is over but I am still trying my best to look for one so that I can start next semester. If not, I haven gotten the the time to think of my plan yet.

Thirdly, August is here. Hate the month! In 2 months time, I have to submit my thesis and therefore I have to do all my research soon and start writing it! Which will be a pain! My plan: .... erm, START soon!

Fourthly, I have got a PTC (Preliminary theology course) exam coming up soon! My plan is to study for it and hopeflly do enough to pass it.

Fifthly, I have so many meetings to go to.... Structural changes in OCF! Alternative plan: I dun have one... Its a must go!

Sixthly, Presidency for OCF... Pretty fun! My plan is to delegate all my job away! HAHAHH!! the evil dictator inside me is coming forth....

On top of all that.. I do have many other commitments. See how exciting my month is, or rather my last semester as an undergraduate is? For some reason, I am no worried at all or not stressed at all! In fact, I am very much relaxed about it, maybe I have adapted well to the aussie culture, or maybe I am just immune to it and my threshold for being stress has increased tremondously over the years. Or maybe it is just the fact that I know my God is way powerful and the strength within me is no longer mine but bestowed by Him. See.. I am not superwoman... just a child of God! hehehhe.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thj8c9KXkkc

I am mentally DISTRESSED!!

As a matter of fact, I had an exam yesterday and I am still suffering from the after effects of it. Oh well, it was a very long and hard paper, I am just crossing my fingers that I will do well. Oh did I mention how long it was???? There was no time limit to the exam and so I went abit over board, I was in there from 9am to 6.30pm. Well I thought it was going to last only 5 hours but I guess nobody actually finished it in 5 hours! (PS. I was not the last one out of the exam hall.. apparently the latest one was about 9.30pm) Guess this exam could be on the guiness book of records for the longest sit down paper ever.....

So you can imagine how LONg it was.. thankfully i brought bread in. And becuase they did not anticipate for it to be so long, there was no lunch break. Our lovely supervisor brought biscuits for us nevertheless...the good old arnotts. It was an interesting experience considering we were the first guinea pigs to try out this format for the honours cohort. Wonder if this beats writing an essay, well I guess it will be the same as an essay considering the fact that i actually wrote about 11-12 pages on the computer. You knwo what i think, I think it is secretly a psych experiments to see how the brain function. Seriously, in the beginning of the exam, we were perky and writing away, by about 3 plus, things got way harder. We were hungry from the lack of lunch, and then our brain start acting slowly, and my sentences were more incoherant than ever. In fact, i don't think I was making much sense of what I was writing at the end of everything but just repeating my point over and over again in different format.

All exams should be like that... no time limits, lunch provided, exercise by walking around is permitted and talking was allowed. I guess cause most of the people in the room had different paper to analyse so it didn't really matter and besides, there was no right or wrong answer to the paper. It was an opinon thing and as long as you state your opinon and justify it, I guess it should be ok. However, the paper was hard to understand or even to read it, therefore I wasn't sure if at the end of everything I actually state my stand and properly justify it. What the heck, they should at least not fail me considering the effort and time I spent in that exam!

Right, now i need to rest from all the mental distress caused last night!

Just a photo to show my 'Mader' as evidence and prove that I am really doing my honours. By the way, above is the picture of the whole entire honours class of 2007. If you can't find me (thats impossible! I am the prettiest one there so should stand out quite abviously)

I have realised that I haven exactly shown what I have been doing for the past few months. Besides nothing (I admit, thats about 90% of my time), I do Gellies (Not edible but pretty!) After months of practicing I can too come up with pretty nice ones like these below.


For those who do not understand what the gel means, thats ok... You just don't belong to one of the smarties and intellects. Just thought that it would be a waste to tug such a sexy gellie photo in my computer and not show the whole world. Only revealing its beauty to the world will do it justice. I have decided to give this gel a name.... its called..... Gelly. (I am a scientist, what do you expect? Can't come up with any other fancier name than this!)


So any-oh-how, I have to start thinking of a present of Big Wynne and Big Jim... What a pity I wouldn't be able to attend their wedding, oh well, I will try my best to think of a present that will make my presence known! I am quite bend of singing 'The Goslings' for their wedding, its a lovely and beautiful song. Even though it has a little sad ending, but well, at least its a 'Till death do us part' kinda song. Isn't it ROMANTIC?

Oh.... totally forgot! The exciting thing this week was my trip to Lowenbrau yesterday. It was cool and cold to see old man dressed in short shorts bouncing around and singing and playing. All for the sake of at atomsphere and entertaining the consumers. Almost wanted to stand up and start singing and dancing with them and bounce around. But well, I have a reputation to keep and I am gentle, I don't dance around in public! I would really love to upload the photos of my delicious yummy food.. Soon...

What a great weekend!!

I always Love weekends since they give me a chance to rest and be away from work and school and just fellowshipping with the BIG 'happy family'! However, I have been having so much fun and so little sleep, but then again, I sacrifice sleep anytime for some FUN!

Thursday:

Well my weekend currently starts on thursday now, considering the fact that people spend half day in school on friday and plus the whole friday just involves eating cake and listening to seminar so i won't consider that as work at all....

Anyway, went for karaoke on thursday night from 10pm to 2am! I Love karaokes except the whole cheena group is gone!!! I miss Jiamin, Vivian, Sam, Trish.... the chinese gang!!! Even though there were a number of chinese songs sang, but it was different!

Friday:

I think I am getting old. Firstly it is hard for me to stay awake past a certain time and after that big night out yesterday, I think I had a hangover from the lack of sleep. Can't believe of all times, Ihad to make an appointment with my Supervisor at 9am in the morning. I am so glad it went pretty well.

Saturday:

Thanks to pohbwee who adores waking up in the wee hours of the morning and find pleasure in torturing me to wake up superbly early on a weekend (which i usually sleep in). But thanks to Aaron for driving us there so that we don't have to wake up earlier.. It was Servant's retreat and I thought it was a unique one.

Lessons Learnt:

1) OCF is a place where we strongly endorsed Good doctrinal teachings, but as what Chris Chua said, we become really critical about the teachings of others that sometimes we make a really big hooha about their teachings (i am not referring to downright heretical teachings) that we criticise them in a ungodly way. I guess thats probably something that we should think about...

2) After listening to the many OCFers talked about how OCF has helped them, it reminded me once again how this ministry does change and helped people to grow. I would testify to that as well, I should be grateful to what OCF has done for me and should try to impart these experiences to others and serve the rest who are new

3) After listening to all the oldies, we should have hope! We should not always be pessimitic but optimistic with prayer. When times get tough and tiring in serving, there is always prayer and the knowlege of GOd being always there with us to help us going in this ministry

Any-oh-how, after a tired day of talks and discussion, we played POKER!!! Somehow it is THE GAME now to play. But it was extrememly Fun and it seems like we have been playing forever. Ultimately, the fellowship with the different people is the most enjoyable especially when all of us at OCF have different talents to show. What can I say???

OCF is a bunch of extremely talented people for Christ, and in OCF we strive to help people discover their talents!!