What If?

Its monday and i am finally getting the sweats for the exams. In 2 days time, i will be waiting outside the exam hall for the call to enter the hall. I wonder how i will feel on that day? Will i be anxious and have a nervous breakdown and try to take control of the situation OR will i be praying and feeling at peace at God's prescence letting him take control?

Just a week ago, i was talking to one of my housemates about carrer options. Since young, i have always wanted to be a mad scientist after being inspired by Einstein. Not the normal kid who wants to be either a lawyer of a doctor. Wonder if that was their ambitions or their parents? Well, I was unique from the start. With their childhood dream, i have always wanted to be in the research field for drugs or just technique to improve or prolong life. So that is my frist career options. So she asked me again, what if that fails? Gee that was another easy question, i will be a forensic analysts for the police force. If that fails as well, I will be a teacher, preferably primary or kindergarden. If all fails, i will just be a housewife at home and that is if i can even find a HUSBAND to begin with. The list could get on but i realised what if all fails, I have no more BACKUP plans. In a flash, i realised how wrong i was. I was anxious as to what i will become and what career options to take, i have always wanted to be a career woman and that was all MY plans. When i sat down at home and thought about the whole career thing, i was thinking about all my backup plans that i have and i wondered what was God's plan? I was so used to having backup plans for all my projects aka 'wet weather plan'. Thankfully I am not God, and God doesn't have backup plan. He knows me more than i know myself, he knows what career path suits me better, he knows what path i should take so that i will glorify him. There are no What ifs? He just knows and he has planned one plan for each of us. Each of us shaped differently like a jigsaw piece. We are all one big picture, 1 big picture and we are just jigsaw pieces. The maker of the Jigsaw sees the big picture but we will have to wait for all the pieces to be together before seeing the whole picture.
Sometimes, i am impatient and i can't wait. I start to take things in my own control and i forgot that it wasn't all about ME. It was all about HIM!